It happened when I was 6.
I was staying with my favorite,”good” grandma-my Dad’s Mom. She was amazing,self-less person,a survivor who raised 3 kids on her own during WW2 and achieved quite high status in her career during the time when women were not at all considered “management” material in Russia AND in a Muslim dominated city as well,where women (even non-Muslim) meant to “know their place”- raising the kids/cleaning/cooking/looking after their husbands-that whole “barefoot and pregnant” mentality.
My grandma’s name was Evdokia and she is and always has been my role model and inspiration. In fact (and I realize this sounds a bit silly), I firmly believe that she is “watching over me” to this day, trying to help me through all life’s trials and tribulations.
She died young-in her late 50’s,working overtime and giving her all trying to help her children. She deserves a separate chapter,which I will definitely write.
The flat where my grandma lived was somewhat typical of Russian housing of that era-it was originally build in early 1900’s, rectangular in shape,2 stories high,with flats/rooms running around the perimeter and forming a courtyard in the middle. There was a big ornate iron gate at the entrance into the courtyard. Before revolution it was probably some sort of boarding house/ rental flats. After the revolution it was appropriated by the government (like everything else) and individual flats were given to citizens.
Although,thanks to the old design, all flats were roomy and had very high ceilings (4-5 meters) and large windows,many were not equipped with private toilets. There were  communal toilets/showers downstairs for everyone. My grandma  (and many others) used a bucket for toileting purposes and then just took it downstairs and emptied it into one of the communal toilets. Grandma even had a special wooden stool build, with an opening in the middle and nice soft padding around it,so you didn’t have to crouch over the bucket-just sat on the “throne”!
To get to certain flats,one had to enter the “main” door,then go along the corridor,where other flats were located.
Clearly,because of the design of the building,everyone knew each other and each other’s business. Friendships and alliances were formed.
One of my grandma’s best friends (a woman about her own age) lived in a downstairs flat with her husband. The two visited each other often to “borrow some sugar”,exchange knitting patters or just for a cuppa and a chat.
One evening Shura (that was friend’s name) was over at my grandma’s place. I was playing and women were looking at some knitting. Shura realised that she needed something from her flat and my grandma sent me to fetch it.
It was winter, 7pm, already dark outside. I run downstairs and knocked on Shura’s door. Her husband (whom I’ve met on many occasions previously) opened the door wearing boxer shorts and a “wife-beater”singlet. I told him that I was sent to get whatever it was (I honestly cannot remember). He invited me in.
As he led me deeper into their flat,the feeling of uneasiness grew inside me. The flat was dark, no lights were on and he had very funny look on his face and the smell of alcohol on his breath. But I was only 6 and brought up to respect and obey my elders,so I followed.
Somehow he maneuvered himself behind me and,before I knew it,his hands were under my dress,caressing me,sliding down and rubbing me over my panties. I froze. He wasn’t hurting me and he wasn’t restraining me, and  he was an adult and authority and I didn’t want to be rude, so I didn’t know what to do and how to act.
He kept saying something about “playing a game”,asking me if I like games. I said yes. He then slid his finger under my panties,touching me all over,but not penetrating.
And then it happened:he pulled out his penis and asked me to touch it. And he forced my hand on it. It was revolting!! Big and hairy and smelly! It looked huge and scary to me. I was only 6 years old. I was terrified and helpless.
I kept trying to move forward,out of his grasp,but he held on to me. He then proceeded telling me that it would be fun to see what happens if he put “his thing” into “my thing”. I just vigorously shook my head and tried to pull away. He said “OK,OK”, but still forced my hand on his penis again and kept rubbing my vagina.
That went on for a few minutes, until I asked for whatever it was Shura needed again and he must have realised that someone (his wife,most likely) will come looking for me if I’m not back soon.
He told me not to tell anyone and that this is “our secret” ( pedophiles are so repetitive:this line must be used millions of times all over the world).
I grabbed whatever I came for and run out. I was shaken. I didn’t know what to do. I kept thinking that if I told my grandma and Shura,I would be in trouble. I sensed that what happened was wrong, but I thought it was ME who’s done something wrong.
I went upstairs and just sat on grandma’s couch quietly. After a few minutes she asked me if I was alright. I said yes and pretended to watch TV.
I’ve never told anyone about that episode. I know now that my grandma would,in all likelihood,kill (quite literally) that bastard and go to jail for it. So in a way, I’m glad I didn’t. I avoided any situation where I would be alone with that guy again,which wasn’t hard,as I didn’t live with that grandma (I lived with my other,evil one,on the other side of town),only visited occasionally.
Men are predators by nature. And as such,they have what I call “a point of no return”. That is when their ugly self-serving instincts completely take over and they are absolutely unable to stop. They know what they’re doing is wrong,that there might and will be consequences,but at that very moment all they can think about is satisfying their primary urges and serving their dicks. Nothing but brutal physical force can stop them when it’s happening. No amount of begging or reasoning. Their brain is shut down.
I am a woman and pride myself on the fact that I can stop at any point. It doesn’t matter how intoxicated I am,how horny or overcome with lust and what stage of coitus I am in. I understand that someone can change their mind unexpectedly and inexplicably at any time “before” or “during”,as humans are very complex beings. “No” means “no” to me.
I’ve had sex with quite a few people, but it was always,always because they really wanted to be in bed with me. I don’t take advantage of drunk and emotionally vulnerable. I would never “trick” someone into having sex. In fact, I hardly ever initiate sex-I wait for the other person to clearly indicate (with either words or actions) that it is,indeed,what they want.
I also don’t have “recreational” sex (you know, when you do it “just for the heck of it”) with women,because for me to truly enjoy it, I need to have an emotional connection with the person,otherwise it feels just like work (as in what I do for a living)  and I never want it to be like that with women.
That’s what separates me from the predators that are male species.

When in NZ, I like to travel around-the country is absolutely gorgeous. I usually combine business with pleasure:do some sightseeing,visit my friends and work at the same time.
NZ only has three major cities:Wellington, Auckland and Christchurch (which is laying in ruins after several major earthquakes at the moment). The rest is comprised of various regions (like Hawkes Bay,Taranaki,Marlborough,Central Otago,etc). Each of those regions has one decent sized town which is considered the “hub” or a “capital”, if you will, of that particular region. Those towns,although pretty small, have some nice restaurants and, once in a while, you can come across an unexpected shop that just might surprise you :).
NZ is very unique when it comes to advertising Working Girl’s services. Prostitution was de-criminalised here over 6 years ago, so it’s perfectly OK to ply out trade and advertise.
However, it’s the only country (in civilised world, I mean) that I know of that relies so heavily on newspaper advertising for the services of prostitutes in this day and age of advanced technology.
Yes, there are websites (one of the biggest and most popular ones being NZGirls which is connected to Adult Forum-the biggest online forum for adult entertainment industry in NZ), but on any given day, your average punter in here picks up local daily paper and looks through adult entertainment section to satisfy his needs.
This creates another phenomenon: girls are asked to describe themselves over the phone and often times that is the only thing punter has as far as “visuals”. You can only imagine how that leads to disappointment sometimes.
Kiwis are very laid back (so much so that if they get any more laid back, they’ll be horizontal..LOL..). This “laid back” attitude definitely spills into the way they talk when making phone inquiries.
For instance, in US, people are very businesslike in their approach to everything. When they call to make a booking or inquire, it’s a very fast-paced conversation with specific,RELEVANT questions and requests.
here, in NZ, it’s a different story…
Let me offer an example of an average phone inquiry. Before I do that, I’d like to point out that I structure my ads to give as much information as possible. For instance: “Euro.Amazing body.DD.Tall,slender.3 days only.Discreet CBD hotel  000-XXX-000 <my phone number>”. So before you ever picked up the phone, you already know that I am white Caucasian (that’s Euro-European) with ample bust,only in town for 3 days (which also means I’m “new”,as I probably never been here before or haven’t been in a long time),really good body,slim and tall.
Ring,ring,ring <my phone rings>
I answer sweetly “Hello”
Punter “Hi…Are you there? I’m calling about your ad in today’s paper”
Me <pause>-I’m waiting for him to proceed with the inquiry as I can’t guess what he wants to know-I can’t read minds
Punter <after a pause> “Yeah,can you give me more info”
Me (still not sure what exactly he wants to know, but just go with the prices for starters,as that’s the only thing NOT covered in my ad). “It’s <amount> for an hour and <amount> for half an hour
Punter “Ay,ye…..” <pause>   “Can I have a brief description?”
Me (thinking:the description is in the ad,if you want to know something specific,ask,but OK) <proceed to repeat the description in the ad, adding country of origin>
Punter “Ay,ye…How old are you?”
Me “Do you have access to Internet? I can direct you to the site where you can see my photos” (because age is a very relative thing and is a matter of perception. for instance, i’ve never had any kids, never done drugs or smoked, never tanned excessively (that ages you a lot). I have no tattooes or piercings and am very slender and take good care of my body with the help of various beauty treatments. So I look much better than some of much younger girls I know who had 3 kids by the age 24,smoke like chimneys, use drugs,etc)
Punter (in 90% of the cases) “No, I am just calling from my phone” (Dah, I know THAT,that wasn’t my question,though-you could have Internet access on your phone for all I know)
Me <give him my age>
Punter “So are you Asian or?..” Now, this is the thing that drives me crazy in this Hemisphere: they ask  questions ending on “..or..” and nothing else. It is incomplete sentence! I was taught at the Uni that I should NEVER do that,as it is a poor grammar. “..or..” WHAT?, for crying out loud.. Besides, after hearing my strong, obviously Slavic accent and reading the ad that says “Euro” how does one even come up with “Asian”?! I don’t get it.
Me “No, I am white European”
Punter “So you’re gonna be here for a while,are you?” (variation:”Are you here for the World up?”-and that matters HOW?)
Me “No. Just like the ad says-3 days only. I don’t live here” (thinking: the ad costs money,why would I waste it printing something that’s not the case??
Punter “Oh..So where are you based?” (again, how does that matter? Note how much time (and phone minutes) is wasted so far)
Me “I live in Wellington”
Punter “Ay, ye.. So when are you available?”
Me “I work by appointment only. I take bookings”
Punter “Ay,ye..So when are you available?”
Me “What time are you looking for?” (this is important,as if the caller only could do morning or lunchtime meeting, there is no reason for me to fire off all available times. Plus, if the punter tells me his desired time, it’s much easier and less time consuming: for instance “I would like half an hour booking at 10 am”.
I understand that guys work and have families/obligations. I DO respect and appreciate their time. They usually can only do it at certain times. Well, tell me what they are and we can sort this out so much quicker!
Punter <sometimes makes a booking and sometimes tells me that he needs “to check his diary” and call me back.
There are variations to this conversation, when punters answer “3 days only ad” and ask me whether I’m “working today”. Well, whaddaya think? I am here for 3 days, I paid for the ad (and they don’t exactly come cheap), I got a hotel room.. Yes, of course I am working!
Or someone rings and asks for the price straight away, then proceeds with all the other questions (see above), only to tell me at the end that it’s too much money. But that was the FIRST question you asked, I want to scream,why didn’t you hang up then and there?
Sometimes guys ask if it’s a “full service I offer or…” (again with that blasted “or” and incomplete sentence).
I am a prostitute, I advertise as such in appropriate section of the newspaper (for instance,Dom Post in Wellington has a separate section for “sensual massage”-meaning massage with “happy ending” vs. full sex service), OF COURSE, it is a full service.
Another huge pet peeve of mine is the concept of “booking” and “appointment” in nz. This particular concept seems foreign to most Kiwis (probably that laid back attitude to blame). In US I had a day-planner and my clients usually booked days and definitely hours in advance. This way I could schedule my own errands in between and allow plenty of time for me to get ready and look my best for the client.
Here people ring and ask if I am “free now”. When I tell them they need to make a booking, they say “OK,let’s make a booking. Can I come over in 10 min?”. I really just want to scream. I do.
“Now” and “10 min from now” is NOT a booking-it’s a booty call. I don’t ask for appointments because I want to sound important-it’s better for everyone that way and much more organised and enjoyable.
I live only 2 min down the street from my employer in Wellington, so sometimes I’m willing to accommodate a ‘booty call” when someone turns up at her doorstep un-announced and she has no girls in the house. However, punter will need to deal with the fact that I, most likely, will not have any make-up on and will be wearing PJs.
I am not kidding:happened a couple of times, when a client had a case of a “morning wood”, rang Lilly, got no answer (as she doesn’t start answering the phones until 10am) and came over anyway!

What really annoys me is punters trying to bargain down the price. I price myself VERY realistically for what I look like and what I have to offer. I don’t understand why people want to embarrass themselves by asking.
Just this morning (I am in Taranaki ATM) the guy called and asked ALL the questions (see sample conversation above) and then said “How about $80”. I started laughing-I honestly couldn’t help myself. He said “You laughing” accusingly and he sounded hurt almost.. Well, don’t ask stupid questions and you won’t get stupid answers-that’s one wisdom my Dad taught me from a very young age.
Something specific to Taranaki happened this trip (it’s never happened anywhere else before) when some guy text me and asked me if I want to have coffee. This is my “work” phone, so I wasn’t sure if he got the wrong number,maybe, but,no.. He saw my ad in the paper and thought it would be OK to text me and ask me for a coffee/drink. He never even booked me before! WTF?!

Sometimes punters call and make “fake” bookings(they book and never turn up and don’t answer their phone)-again, very NZ thing. I can’t imagine why would one want to do it and how is it fun for them? It is very frustrating,as for me it means loss of money and time, as I can’t book someone else on such short notice and don’t have enough time to go do something else,as I usually have another booking coming shortly (I try to schedule several bookings in a row with a nice long break in-between the “rows”).

I love NZ-it’s a beautiful country which is very unique. Generally,people are awesome:kind, easy going and relaxed. But sometimes doing business is challenging,that’s for sure :/

Recent article in Yahoo news reminded me of my flight attendant stint when I was 18.
I must say, it was absolutely the BEST job, the one that I really truly liked and was willing to do forever. Alas, it wasn’t meant to be: I only had it for a few months. But, boy, was it fun!

I’ve been dreaming about that job for years. I’d see flight attendants in town, in their blue uniforms and think of how great it would be to travel everywhere. Back then stewardess job was very much romanticised and everyone thought it was so glamorous. It wasn’t actually,as I found out later, but I still loved it and had a lot of fun doing it.
Everything was owned by the government back then, including the only airline Russia had-Aeroflot.

Although airport itself was about 45 min drive out of my hometown, local Aeroflot Headquarters building was right in CBD.
One sweet summer day I went in there: I wanted to know how one would go about applying for a job (as jobs were not advertised in newspapers back then).
I was told that initial interviews/auditions for flight attendants were held on the 20th of every month.
Dressed in my best “professional” outfit (white blouse with high ruffled collar and navy blue skirt), I was at the door on the 20th at the appointed time.
I was ushered in a room where a “panel” sat: 4 men and 1 woman. They asked me various questions about my education and background and gave me appraising looks. At the end of the interview I was told to wait in another room.
After about 20 min wait I was called back and told that I was “pre-selected”, BUT… I needed to undergo a medical/vision examination to determine whether or not I was fit to fly.
I was so excited! My dream was within my reach!
Next few days proved really trying,though, as I had to see various specialists in different clinics and undergo  numerous X-Rays. I almost didn’t make the cut because of my chronic sinus problem: apparently if you had persistent sinus infections, you were axed. So I asked one of my girlfriends to undergo X-Ray for sinuses under my name: I was on pins and needles during that time,afraid to get caught, but it worked! I was in!
I was told to come and fill out the paperwork at HR office. That’s where I hit another snag: the legal age for the job was 18 and I was only 17. But I pleaded with HR woman, pointing out that I was going to turn 18 within a month-she agreed to let it slide.
The day I got issued my brand new uniform was the happiest day of my life. I couldn’t wait to start working.
We (newbies) underwent a three-day training program and then were assigned to “seniors” for probation period. Basically, it was like an apprenticeship, where we learned “on the job”. However, if we failed the “final inspection” by one of the senior flight attendants when the “training period” was over, we could still loose the job.
I don’t know of anyone who failed,though,as the job is really not a rocket science. The hardest part was to try and get everything done in a limited time frame that we had, as back then Aeroflot was not a modern, sophisticated airline it is now and lots of tasks had to be done manually.
As I’ve said, I loved the job, but only was able to do it for a few months: I was actually full-time student then and, as I got started in the beginning of the summer, it was fine until Sept, when I had to attend regular day-time classes at the Uni 6 days a week. I was still holding on to the job until Oct, when my Mom literally locked me out of the flat one day when I got home after a flight and demanded that I go back and resign,as I was missing way too many days from the Uni.
But I do have some interesting stories to tell 🙂

First was my brief love affair with a pilot: how could a stewardess career (however brief) exist without one,right?
His name was Tofic, he was half-Azerbaijani,half Russian (mixes are always so hot and sexy, both male and female). He was a First pilot, a Captain, much older than me, about 17 years my senior (back then I always went for older men). He was married to his second wife (ex-stewardess herself) who was heavily pregnant and worked at the main Aeroflot office at the time. In retrospect, he just wanted to get laid (wife’s heavy pregnancy  was not conducive to that), was flattered that he could get “barely 18” girl into bed and I found the whole thing really exciting. It was my first “proper” affair with an older,married man. At no point did I have visions of us getting serious at any stage: I was just swept away with the novelty of it all.
We flirted, then I made an effort to get flights which he was piloting, then we ended up on the “overnight” flight (long flight, where the crew gets to a destination and spends the night in a hotel,returning to home base the next day) and, of course had some steamy sex, made even more exciting by the fact that it was “wrong” and “prohibited”.
Sadly, I could never join a “mile-high” club with Tofic :/, as he was,in fact a FIRST pilot-he couldn’t leave the cockpit for long.
We did have some “standing up” sex at the front door of his hotel room: it was a small enclosure with the door leading to a main hallway and another door leading to the room. The crew was in the room and both doors were closed, but unlocked, so anyone could walk in on us at any time-oohhh,that was so exciting!
On one of the “overnight” trips we went camping and him and I “did it” in the tent, in a sleeping bag, while his second pilot was snoring right next to us.
That affair lasted a few months even after I quit the job, but then kind of  fizzled out all by itself (natural progression of things).
I did hear from Tofic again, 2 years later, when our town was under siege (see “How I survived the war” post). He actually made an effort to locate me and offered to get me out of town-his crew was planning to,basically, hijack the plain and just get “out of dodge”. Extreme circumstances is where you find out who your REAL friends are,that’s for sure.

Russia had a lot of small planes in circulation back then. One of those was YAK40. It was very basic plane used for shorter,”local” flights. Several times pilots let us,stewardesses “steer” the plane-it was real steering,too,as everything on it was manual. One time the pilot actually let me sit on his lap during the take-off and, literally,pull the plane up off the ground (all I had to do was pull the “wheel” towards me). Looking back, I realise how dangerous it was (I had absolutely no clue what I was doing), but that’s the beauty of being young and inexperienced: you don’t really grasp full consequences of your behaviour (that pilot and I were putting not just our lives, but the lives of about 20 other people in danger).

Another type of plane, TU134, was a bit bigger, but fleet of those was much older and in a very sad condition. It,too, had “manual” steering. I was in the cockpit once during the take-off (blatant violation of the rules) and the pilot was this really short guy. As he started to pull the wheel towards him to lift the plane off the ground, I noticed that he was slowly standing up, trying to get proper leverage (those planes had no hydraulics). By the time we reached cruising altitude, the pilot was standing up fully, just like a captain of a ship. The whole thing looked hilarious to me; I could barely contain my laughter :).

Working a flight on the same type of plane once, I was in the kitchen, sitting on the bench,feet propped against the stove;often times we’d put extra passengers on flights in exchange for bribes,as tickets were sold out for months ahead and we gave up our “crew” seats and violated all aviation safety standards by sitting or even standing without seat belts during take-off and landing. The plain was taking off and I heard this creaking noise: it sounded like the plain was coming apart at the seams! I held my breath and prayed fervently that it holds up, as it was old and there is such thing as “metal fatigue”.. It held 🙂

The best and biggest plane in Russian Aeroflot fleet back then was TU154. Those plains were newer and nicer. Still, they had their problems. Many times Russian ingenuity of the pilots saved the day.
Like that one time when we were approaching Moscow… We started our descent when, to my great amazement, I saw the 4th pilot (also known as “flight engineer”) run into the kitchen. This was highly irregular,as all of the crew was needed at the cockpit to execute the landing.
Without saying a word, engineer pulled all the fuses from our kitchen stove and rushed back into the cockpit.
Landing went without a hitch and, when all the passengers left the plane, we were told that the whole instrument panel went dark during landing (there was electric short and all the fuses were blown)-we lost all navigation. Instead of panicking, engineer demonstrated some quick thinking by using kitchen fuses!

Another time we just barely took off when the First pilot rang the kitchen: apparently, one wheel of the landing gear was stuck midway and we needed to burn all the fuel before we would try to “belly-land”. Back then it was not customary for a captain to explain the situation to the passengers: it was our job as a cabin crew. We tried to delay it as long as we could, but a few started getting alarmed when they noticed that we are just cruising around the take-off city on a low altitude.
We explained the situation, told passengers not to panic and stay seated with their seat belts on. Of course, not everyone listened. We had to keep everyone calm for the next 2 hours and people were getting antsy.
It was nerve-racking. At one point I noticed some guy getting up from his seat and reaching into overhead compartment. I’ve had enough: I swiftly went over,pushed him into his stomach, which effectively forced him  back into his seat and told him to “sit the fuck down and don’t move”. He did as he was told-I think I looked really scary..LOL..
Ultimately, the landing ended up being drama-free;almost in the last minute the gear went un-stuck.

Back in those days different areas of Russia were experiencing shortages of different goods/products. I think everyone knows about the toilet paper issue, as it was featured in many a movie..LOL..
There were other things. For instance, my hometown had shortage of meat and butter. Each family received coupons from local authorities: one per person, for a kilo of butter and 2 kilos of meat per month. We had to go to the grocery store and present the coupon and then purchase those. Although displayed in the cases,meat and butter were not sold without the coupons.
However, other republics/cities were not affected by those shortages. While I was a stewardess, I had a neat little business going, bringing cases of butter back home and re-selling it at a profit.
My Mom would inform our neighbours in advance, before I even got home from the flight and they would “put the order in” (how many kilos). It went really fast-I never had anything left over,as Russians like to bake and our baked good are very rich and require a lot of butter 🙂

Certain flight routes were more desirable than the others to both pilots and flight attendants. For instance, flights to Tallinn (capital of Estonia) ranked pretty high up there,as to us Estonia was almost “The West”-it was sophisticated,elegant and beautiful  with huge cafe culture (almost unheard of in those days).
One had to be friends with the roster-maker to get those flights,as they were limited and only “seniors” got them.
Tallinn was “overnight” flight, so the crew could really partake in the city,it’s bars and restaurants.
Often times crew would get together in a hotel room after a night out,drinking. This usually ended in mass orgy (as it does :).
On one such occasion (I wasn’t there), one of the stewardesses had a change of heart and refused the advances of the pilots. I don’t seriously believe anyone was going to rape her, but everyone was really drunk (including said stewardess) and she ended up jumping out of the window (it was only second floor) and landing on a canopy of the hotel. She wasn’t hurt at all, rather really embarrassed (she was practically nude).
This caused Estonian Administration Of Civil Aviation to lodge a formal complaint to our boss (the Head of Azerbaijani Administration Of Civil Aviation) and his brilliant solution was to cut out “overnight” portion of Tallinn flights for 3 months, as a punishment. We were all pretty pissed,as that “overnight” was our little treat and one of the perks of the job and everyone got punished because of two people’s bad judgement while under influence.

I have to point out that although few of the pilots violated the rules sometimes (like flying while still hangover), Russian pilots were really well trained and skilled. They had to fly inferior  planes/equipment and they made it happen over and over again, dealing with emergencies “on the go”.

Many years ago, when I lived in America, I watched a documentary about a plane that crashed due to malfunction of navigational equipment. The “black box” was recovered and recording of the conversation in the cockpit was re-played.
What happened, in a nutshell, was the plane was flying in a really bad weather,at night, with zero visibility. Somehow,gages malfunctioned and were showing the wrong altitude (pilots believed they were a lot higher than they actually were). At some point,all communication with the control tower was lost as well. As everyone was relying on instruments alone, pilots were executing a “blind” landing. They believed they were 1500 meters high. When they finally came out of the low clouds, it became apparent that they were only 500 meters high! They saw the ground rushing up at them.
What really impressed me was the Captain (the First pilot): while his “second in command” was screaming and,clearly,lost all control, the Captain just kept saying in a low,calm voice “it’s OK,we’re gonna make it. It’s alright. Calm down.”.
Understand that at that point, when he saw the ground and realised how low they actually were, he knew he was seeing his death,plain and simple. There was absolutely no way to correct the plane and pull it up-there wasn’t time. No miracle could save the plane in that stage and, as trained professionals, pilots knew that in a instant (that’s why the second one started screaming). Yet the Captain maintained his composure and tried to calm his “second” down. To me, it was truly astounding.

I did miss being a stewardess. I’ve applied for a job with Delta when I moved to US and was actually offered a position. But you know what they say about not being able “to step into the same river twice…
The money offered was miserable AND I had to move (permanently) from California to Newark and due to my circumstances back then, it just wasn’t possible…

Yip, the old adage is true: road to hell is,indeed,paved with good intentions.
Often times we sincerely set out to do a good thing and it turns sour… Or our intentions are misunderstood… Or we don’t want to admit to ourselves that there was a hidden agenda deep inside the deed that on the surface seemed noble
Human beings are very complex creatures-remember Shrek and his “onion” theory? Well, I agree: we are all like onions: there are layers upon layers in all of us: some good, some bad,some thin and some quite thick..
Our motivations are often unclear to ourselves, yet alone to others.
For instance, when you contact a working girl (unsolicited) and offer information regarding one of the other working girls that was passed on to you by said WL’s EX-employer-what is your motivation? Do you genuinely want to warn the girl because you don’t want her to get in harm’s way? Or do you want to make a good impression on her and get into her confidence, so she’d share some other industry insider tidbits with you? Or do you simply hope she’ll give you “extra special” service with extras next time you see her professionally in gratitude? Or is it a little bit of all of the above?

Truth is, we want to look good and we want others to like us-it’s human nature. Someone I once knew said “I like to be liked and hate to be hated”-that’s pretty much it in a nutshell and holds true for all of us, whether or not we admit it to ourselves. We seek approval of our peers-it’s in our genetic make-up.
Trouble is, sometimes we go in a round-about way in order to get it.
So when someone takes a high moral ground on an issue, do they do it purely because they feel really strongly about it or maybe just a little because they want to “look good” to others, because it’s the fastest way to gain approval and admiration?
Personally, I no longer “ride the high horse” about anything, as I am well aware of my own shortcomings and I know all too well that once you start talking “high and mighty”, people automatically want to take closer look at you and start searching for flaws,as it is a “knee-jerk” reflex: “you are not so pure yourself” reaction. And let’s face it: none of us are without a fault (well, unless you’re Mother Theresa… and she is dead..). But I’ve learned this lesson as part of my life’s experience and it took me quite some time. It was a different story when I was younger: I was absolutely convinced that at least certain things are black and white and there is nothing in between….
Now I know life is, by far, not that simple.

Often times we want to be perceived as leaders, forward-thinking and knowing the “right” path for everyone.
We want people to look up to us.
So when an “independent”  WL suggests to the one working in a parlour that she should do the same (start working independently) and even offers to help her out with advice and maybe some client recommendations, what is her real motive?
Does she truly believes that the other girl would be much better off and just wants her to “see the light”? Or does she crave respect and gratitude? Or is she trying to get back at the parlour owner who didn’t give her enough credit and wants to prove to her that she is, in fact, mature,capable and able to lead others?
And what about the other girl? Does she feel offended because someone thinks that she doesn’t know what’s best for her? Or did she think about it before and realised that,for whatever reason, she won’t be able to do it and now is just annoyed that someone thinks she is not smart enough to think for herself? Or is she afraid of possible negative implications from her employer and just doesn’t want to admit it? Or does she truly like the situation she is in and is really comfortable with the way things are?

I found out long time ago that when someone doesn’t like you, it’s not likely to abate. Whatever the reason (sometimes people can’t even state clearly why exactly they dislike someone-it’s absolutely irrational), no matter what you say or do, they will remain entrenched in their opinion. In fact, the harder you try to prove yourself, the more animosity (and annoyance)  you create.
A lot of people like me… A lot hate my guts.. More still can care less about me altogether.. That’s life.
I just go with the flow: nothing I say or do will change that. In fact, I am like that myself: for example, there is a girl I absolutely cannot stand for personal reasons (to a point where I avoid working in a parlour where she is employed,despite of the fact that I really like the establishment and everyone else who works there), but objectively speaking, she is probably OK. I am not likely to change my opinion of her, no matter what.
Often times people try to pass their opinion on to others (consciously AND subconsciously). So when someone contacts a working girl and passes some information regarding her new mentor’s checkered past, what is their motivation? Do they genuinely just want to warn the girl and keep her out of the harm’s way? Or do they want to pass on their own personal dislike for said mentor and maybe sway the girl into their way of thinking? Do they even know what the true motivation is themselves?

The problem with passing of any kind of information is that it’s not likely to end with the person you’ve passed it on to. That’s another lesson I’ve learned long time ago.
No matter how much you say “Don’t tell anyone”, people will-again, it’s just the human nature. Even people who condemn gossiping, do, in fact, pass various information to others. They don’t think it’s gossiping because it’s “true” or they did it for noble reasons, or it was “absolutely necessary”, but it is what it is, no matter what the reason.
Information is valuable. It has been since time immemorial. Thrones and kingdoms were lost and gained through learning and passing of the Intel. In fact, espionage is, in my opinion, one of the corner stones of makings of the history 🙂
People pass information for different reasons: sometimes purely for gain, sometimes in exchange for leniency, sometimes for leverage, sometimes because we genuinely like the person talked about and want to warn them,sometimes to get ourselves out of the “dog house”,sometimes because we want to know more or just want to verify the facts-the reasons are so many.
One would think that every time we pass information, we are aware of consequences,surely?? You’d think so, but no, not always the case.
So when you get a feedback (or a backlash,as case might be), as a result of your information passing, do you get angry at the person you passed it on (especially when you didn’t specify that it was “for their ears only)? Do you not blame yourself first and foremost (especially when you offered said information unsolicited)?
I am guilty of this myself. When I was younger, I’ve lost a friendship that was was quite dear to me because of passing of the information. I didn’t do it maliciously, but through some really weird and round-about channels ( which I couldn’t even imagine in a million years) it affected my friend and she knew I was the one who said things. I’ve lost that friend forever. I have no one to blame but myself.

We have  to do what we have to do everyday to survive. It’s easy to be virtuous when you live by yourself in a far away castle and have unlimited wealth..LOL.. The rest of us, mere mortals need to put bread (and butter and caviar) on the table. In order to do this successfully, we need to co-exist with our co-workers and bosses and clients. And, yes, we often need to massage their ego and “go with the flow”-it’s just the way the cookie crumbles.
Often things are complicated and not at all black and white and we are forced to divide our loyalties and choose between  friends and colleagues/employers. Inevitably,we do what we think is the best thing for us,as we have to maintain the roof over our heads and often other people are dependent on us (such as our kids, elderly parents,partners,etc).  So can we honestly judge someone who took a public stand against someone who helped them in the past in order to get “brownie points” from their current employer? Do we really know what goes  through their mind? They might feel torn, they might even try to make it up to a person in private, yet others will never know, will they?
Happened to me before: I took a stand in support of my now ex-girlfriend against our mutual employer, although I didn’t necessarily agree with ALL points of her position and didn’t think she handled the situation exactly right. But she was my girlfriend, I loved her deeply and did everything I could to support her. I actually went as far as contacting local newspapers! Do I regret it? No, not at all-I did what I had to do for the loved one. Would I maintain the same position now? No, because we no longer together and she probably has someone else to massage her ego 🙂 and I can be objective.
That’s the nature of life: it is fluid-nothing is carved in stone. We entitled to change out minds and it’s perfectly fine. Some days we feel differently about certain things than others-it depends on our mood,personal circumstances,etc. And it’s OK.

We get quite involved in things that we do on a daily basis: our jobs, our hobbies-because we spend so much time engaged in those. We participate in related blogs, forums, discussions. We passionately defend out point of view and curiously explore unknown aspects. Often we attend relevant conventions even. It’s called “networking” and it helps us advance in our chosen fields, gain recognition and often reap monetary rewards.All of it is very important to us. It seems like it’d stay that way forever. But it doesn’t. When we switch jobs/fields/countries other things become relevant and important and they replace the ones from before.
It is very natural-we can only concentrate on so many things at one time and there are only so many hours in the day.
It doesn’t mean that we were falsely representing ourselves in that other field before-it just means that we’ve moved on and are now focusing our energies on new projects.
With time, others replace us and the cycle continues.
It’s the same in sex industry. Some girls gain quite high profile and increase their earnings as a result. It seems like they’ll stay that way forever ( good examples are porn stars..LOL..). But when they’re gone, others take their place quite fast and the old ones become a distant memory..
Some girls want to erase all traces of their past when they’re done with escorting. Although quite impossible  to obliterate everything completely in this day and age of modern technology, it is doable. In fact, new,”reputation repair” companies sprouted recently: a lot of corporate companies and individuals as well as celebrities, use them. What they do, in a nutshell, is for a substantial amount of money, they “pollute” Internet with blog entries,articles,etc about said company/individual, thus “burying” negative posts on pages 5,6 or further on the search engines, making it “invisible” for all intents and purposes,as we all have short attention span these days and who wants to “root” through 5 pages and look through every single post…
At the end of the day, it’s just another hooker in a sea of many thousands disappearing into oblivion, to be replaced by thousands more. It’s not like she found the cure for cancer or a way to resolve world’s economic crisis and then deleted all her findings…LOL..
I guess, sometimes people get really wrapped up in something they enjoy and they forget that in the big scheme of things whatever they’re so involved in might be quite insignificant.
We’ve got to remember not to loose sight of what’s truly important: people we love and care about. Life is short and tomorrow may never come. I have a friend who went to bed feeling great and woke up with failed kidney (true story). Do you think he thought about punting and hookers (working or retired) just then? I think not. Same when my Dad woke up one morning and realised that he couldn’t move OR speak (he had a stroke)…. Think about it….

Sometimes certain things really ruffle our feathers.. We feel very strongly and passionately about those. Sometimes people “rub us the wrong way” or touch the nerve… It’s perfectly OK to speak up, to fight back, to express our opinions. In fact, more people should,as honesty really is the best policy. But in doing so we should be careful not to cross the line into nastiness, we should remember that decency and civility are values,too and ppoisonous language doesn’t advance our cause.

There is a very lively debate going on Adult Forum (http://www.adultforum.co.nz/) sparked by Lovely Betty’s blog post (http://bettybeldensblog.blogspot.com/) re. the possibility of a new legislation, which could make it illegal for WLs to work privately and parlours/clubs and agencies would then be the only way to ply our trade.
Battle lines have been clearly drawn (I LOVE the smell of napalm in the morning!..LOL).

Clearly, parlour owners will greatly profit from this arrangement, as the competition (girls working privately) would be wiped out overnight.
There are a lot of girls working privately in NZ,as it is as easy as putting the ad in the local paper.
A lot of those girls are very high caliber,truly stunning, situated in beautifully appointed premises. Of course, punters opt for those more often than not, as it provides a better atmosphere for GFE,privacy and discretion, to name just a few perks.
Of course, there are plenty of amateurs as well, trying to make a quick buck by pedalling their wares: they misrepresent themselves in the ads, have terrible houses/flats from which they work,have no idea of what proper service really means and,generally, are a sorry excuse for hookers.
Clearly, there is a place for both parlours and private workers, as different clients are after different things: some really want to come in for a chat first, have a drink, a cigarette, have a look around…

As wars are being waged on AF, I thought I talk about what parlours are like both here (NZ) and in Australia.

Australian parlours are generally very nice. Granted, there are exceptions, but if you find yourself in a big metropolis, like Melbourne, for instance, and go into one of many major brothels, you’ll be impressed.

Most of them are beautifully decorated and often have “themed” rooms.

For instance, Harem in South Melbourne is all about “old-style bordello boudoir”: there are crystal chandeliers, gold-gilded mirrors, and red and gold velour everywhere.
All the rooms have velour bedding (different colour in every room). Couple of rooms have four-poster beds and all of them have jacuzzi tabs. Entire place smells of old-world charm and luxury.

Every parlour has a lounge for the girls. Lounges are equipped with large flat-screen TVs w/Foxtel (AU version of Sky). There are plenty of comfortable couches for the girls to sit on. Robes and blankets are provided, so girls could cover themselves if they feel chilly. There are newspapers and magazines provided by the parlour for our perusal. Parlours are kept very warm, they all have central air and girls can control the thermostat or ask the receptionist to do so.

All parlours have kitchens and tea, coffee and juice is supplied for the girls by the parlour at no charge. Often parlours also offer toast, cans of tuna, minute noodles,tomatoes and cold cuts as well-again, at no charge, so the girls could have a snack while on shift.

Money is paid to the girls in cash BEFORE each booking commences. There are no “shift fees” or “advertising fees” or fines or any other such nonsense.

All parlours have cameras, so girls can see the client BEFORE they go out and do the into: this is how they avoid being “outed” by the people they know. Sometimes funny things happen: like when one of my friends was staring in horror at the camera,as she saw he best friend’s (AND roommate’s) fiancee walking through the door (and receptionist telling us that he is “such a good,regular client”)..LOL..

If the girl doesn’t want to do the into, she is not obligated to: all she has to say to receptionist “Not for me, thank you”. Even if she happens to be the only girl available, she won’t be made to go see the client.

Parlours have huge supply of linens and towels and those are kept in good condition: any sign of wear and tear and they’re thrown out.

All parlours have professional cleaners come in every day and they do a very thorough job.

Girls are asked to work certain length of time (usually about 6-7 hours, but NEVER longer than 8 hours). To encourage the girls, most parlours offer a “bonus” system. Those differ, but usually you get ENTIRE amount (the house doesn’t take their fee out) on your 6th booking if you worked for required amount of time (7 hours). However, most parlours are very reasonable: if there are few girls on and it’s not busy, they will let you go at any time, if you wish to do so. No parlour would ever make you work for 10-12 hours, although some girls choose to do so when they are in a dire need of money.

Condoms (of ALL sizes) and lube are provided by parlours for free.
Most parlours have intercoms in the rooms along with panic buttons.

Some places stand out above the rest. For instance, Collinwood Confidential (former Grosvernor) was bought outright (business AND the building) by two gay guys a year ago. What a difference they’ve made!

They purchased all new beds,mattresses,pillows and linens (beautifully colour-coordinated to match the new colour scheme). The entire place was remodeled and re-painted (slow,pain-staking work,as it had to be done room-by-room). It is now a very classy, contemporary place.
Girl’s lounge is HUGE and it has a number of couches as well as  amazingly comfy armchairs  (in case if you want a little solitude and don’t feel like sitting on the couch chatting and watching TV).
There is a large covered outside area for those who like to smoke.
Boys provide yogurts,cold cuts, tomatoes,soups and noodles,tuna and salmon,biscuits,designer teas (such as Lady Grey), fresh pastries every morning and often bring additional special treats during the day. All that at no charge to the girls!
There is 52″ flat-screen TV w/Foxtel, fresh gossip mags and newspapers.
They offer DOUBLE bonus system: they pay you additional $5 for each booking  at the end of your shift and a full bonus for your 6th booking.
More importantly, they really care about well-being and safety of the girls. They take time to talk to each girl individually (and there are a lot of girls working in that parlour), find out what her situation is, what days/hours are best suited for her and try to tailor the schedule to fit her needs/goals.
They also pay close attention to every detail.
Mike and Barry (the owners) are great! This is how a parlour should be run.

Yes, there are definitely run-down sad-looking parlours in Melbourne as well, but the goods ones are everywhere, so why even bother with the bad ones??

Also, in Australia WLs have to undergo mandatory health testing every month: one cannot work in a parlour without a DC (doctor’s certificate). Testing includes blood sample (once every 3 months) and STI swab (vaginal and throat,as Gonorrhea could be nesting in there-take a note,those who ask for “natural” blow job-it’s a medical fact). This is strictly enforced.
Once the client has chosen a girl and paid, he is taken into the room and subjected to a “health check” (performed by the girl). We usually look for obvious signs of STI. If the girl notices something “out of order” she could either ask another girl to double check or simply tell the receptionist that the client failed health check. In that case the guy is given his money back and shown the door. No questions asked.
It is, actually, a very good practice,as there is nothing worse than being in the middle of a booking and suddenly seeing something that’s clearly a sign of STI: it makes it very awkward for all concerned.

Girl can refuse to see any client even if she’s done the into: if she feels uncomfortable, no one will force her.
Generally, receptionists are “on the ball”, watching client’s depart:girls meant to walk them out. If the girl is not there with the client, receptionist will immediately buzz the room to make sure that the girl is OK.

Now.. NZ parlours… I worked in a few and my girlfriend worked in some, so the following is compilation of our experiences.
Quite a few of NZ parlours are run-down (some are just plain dirty). A lot of them were “converted” in a hurry and have mismatched furniture bought in second-hand stores. This is especially true for smaller towns.
I’ve worked in a places where parlour has doubled up as owner’s personal storage: there was everything but a kitchen sink in there, in plain view. NZ owners are also very stingy with power:sometimes the heater in the room is not turned on until you actually walk in it with a client (and most NZ buildings don’t have any insulation, so in winter rooms are ice-cold and barely warm up by the end of one-hour booking,when the heater is switched off again).
There are few truly beautiful places (FunHouse being one of them), but on the average parlours in NZ are pretty sad looking: they are all in a major need of remodel (old,peeling paint and water stains), linens are threadbare and they all show signs of neglect.
Parlours would often dictate which shift they let any particular girl to work. Often they require very long shifts (10-12 hours).
Many parlours pay the girls at the end of the shift (which creates the problem if the girl wants to leave early) or even weekly (I would never work for a place like that, as it creates way too many variables).
Often parlours don’t have a nice area for girls to sit while waiting for a client (sometimes it’s just a cramped under-the-stairs area next to a washer and dryer). Or they DO have a nice area, but the girls are obligated to stand on their feet and talk to the clients all the time while not in a booking.
Some male owners take liberties with WLs and “sample the goods” for free before they let girls work in their establishments.
There are no health checks (for either girls or clients) and girls often pressured into seeing clients they don’t want to see or perform “extras” they don’t want to do as a condition of their  employment.
Often there are no intercoms or panic buttons.
Sometimes owners or receptionists “close their eyes” on the fact that a client is way too intoxicated, agitated or plain dangerous-they just want the money.
Sometimes owners “micromanage” the girls and decide who they want to introduce to any particular client or what the girl should wear,etc.

Bottom line: in my humble opinion, NZPC and the Government should try and regulate parlours/clubs a bit more. We need to set higher standards,as some of those places are just plain embarrassing.

Parlour receptionists are a different story altogether. Some of them are really great and go out of their way to create a great atmosphere for both girls and clients (not an easy balancing act).
However, I’ve seen receptionist unceremoniously poking and pushing the girl to wake her up after a 10-hour shift to say “Hi” to a drunk client who couldn’t even string 2 words together coherently… I’ve witnessed them implying that the girl would “loose” her money if she left early…
I was imposed a fine once for refusing to use  parlour’s driver to take me to work (I’d rather have my own car at all times). You can guess why that parlour insisted on a driver taking girls to and from work: less freedom for the girl,as it’s not that easy to leave on your own at 2 am, especially if the receptionist refuses to give you your money.
Some receptionists are quite skilled at “scary tactics”: they don’t say things out loud, but rather, imply them. This way they can always deny they’ve done anything wrong.
My girlfriend was working in a major parlour in Auckland when she became ill during the shift. Manager told her she would be fined $200 (!!) if she left early. In that same parlour my girlfriend’s wallet (with $800 in it)was stolen by another WL. Management did find the culprit that very night, but… They let her back to work 3 days later!
There are some pretty good agencies I know of in Wellington, where they rent private apartments, furnish them nicely and book the girls through phone/Internet. However, same problems exist: some managers pressure the girls into doing multiple bookings in a row (say 5-6) or into seeing clients the girls don’t want to see.
The best and most successful one at the moment is First Impressions, as it’s run by the girls themselves as a co-op (every girl truly works for herself).

Receptionists really do have the power to “make or break” any girl’s income. This I know for a fact.
I am friends with a really great receptionist in Melbourne. She truly cares and a lot of times acts as a “personal assistant” to the girls. I remember her telling me once to bring my washing in and she’d wash/dry and fold it for me, so I could work! (of course, I never took her up on that, but she seriously meant it). She would go after a client without the slightest hesitation if she suspected the girl was in trouble.
She told me once that she has a special pen on her at all times (NOT the flimsy plastic kind), so she could aim for the guy’s throat with it if he intended any harm to the girl.
She is the one who told me it is so easy to manipulate and control any one’s bookings. For instance, she overheard this one very pretty and very popular girl making fun of another, less attractive WL and being quite nasty and unkind. My friend demanded that the pretty one apologised immediately (the other girl was in tears and my friend hates injustice). When the girl stubbornly refused, my friend told her that she will not see another booking until she produces a heart-felt apology.
The way she did it was very subtle: after all the private intros were done, if the client wanted to book the pretty girl in question, my friend would hesitate for just a fraction of a second.. Then say “OK, sure, if you want her..” and just trail off. Of course, the guy would ask for more info and my friend would say “Oh, I don’t know.. I haven’t heard anything BAD about her.. In fact, no one said anything,really… Not like they do about (another girl’s name)-she CONSTANTLY gets a lot of great comments”. Of course, the guy then books that other girl..
You see how easy it is?
I was entangled with a receptionist from another parlour (see Lamentable Lesbian Love Story) and we never really got started… The girl she is with now happens to also be a receptionist in that same parlour.
I did one shift with her (you could cut the tension with a knife) and only got one booking, despite of the fact that I was THE ONLY girl available AND clients seem to like me in the into. They all went to talk to the receptionist (you have to in order to make a booking) and they all left without booking. I’m sure she had something to do with it.
We are all human: sometimes we can’t help the way we feel and our emotions get the best of us. In ideal world, the only criteria would be one’s job performance, appearance,attitude and work ethic. But we don’t live in ideal world, do we?
At least, when the girls work private, they have no one but themselves to blame if their business fails. That’s why some cannot do it: they need the structure and discipline of the parlour. But the parlours shouldn’t take advantage of that. It is a very fine line and a hard balance to find, but some manage to do it (and those are usually the most successful ones)

AdultForum has given me a lot of inspiration as of late,it seems.. Who would’ve thought.
Another lively discussion was started the other day. At the center of it: service (or quality of thereof) in lower priced agencies/parlours.
I like metaphors, so will use one to illustrate my point.
How often do you walk by a kebab  (or a subway sandwich) shop and, on a whim, stop to have a quick meal? Or find yourself suddenly hungry and just pop into a neighbourhood pizzeria? Quite often you’d say. Not much thought goes into it,is it? You feel the urge, you satisfy it.
Now, how often do you just “pop” into the Logan Brown (one of Wellington’s premiere five-star restaurants,the winner of many culinary awards and accolades)? My guess is, not that often.
One of the reason being  Logan Brown is booked out more often than not and requires advanced bookings.
Another reason is it’s not cheap. A dinner for two with wine match there could easily set you back $300-$500 or more (depending on your wine taste).
Usually such dinner signifies a special occasion, so the booking is made in advance and event is eagerly anticipated. Preparations are made. Certain amount of time is set aside to fully enjoy the experience.
Your expectations are quite different as well.
While at a kebab shop (or any similar establishment) you simply expect the ingredients to be fresh and the meal satisfying, you often could care less about the decor, ambiance and hardly ever expect high level of service:efficient and expedient fulfillment of your order with a “thank you” and a smile would usually suffice.
So you pop in, have them wrap your kebab up,pay and go (or hungrily consume it in the shop,as case might be).

It’s a whole different story in a place like Logan Brown. You’re paying good coin for your experience, so you note every detail and your expectations are high.
You want the ambiance. You want award-winning designs in decor. You expect everything to be spotless.
You want “premium” soap and expensive features in the bathroom. You expect your server to have extensive knowledge of food and wine and cater to your every whim. You don’t want your food just “piled high” on the plate: you want to see artistic presentation that vows you even before you took a single morsel into your mouth.
You want the experience to last, as well. You don’t want to be rushed. You can well spend anywhere from two to four hours enjoying that dinner.

Both types of places serve the same purpose: you go there hungry, have a satisfying meal and leave sated.

But how terrible it would be if there were ONLY kebab shops available or ONLY Logan Brown types of restaurants! It would be unthinkable,as we have different needs at different times.
Same people partake in both on a regular basis. Existence of different types of establishments provide the balance we need in our daily lives.

It’s not much different in sex industry. Simply put, sometimes you just want a quick kebab and sometimes you want a masterpiece to be enjoyed at length.
Some agencies/parlours specialise in “volume” business. They charge less and provide the same basic service,but things are not quite as “upscale”: you could run into another punter on the way in or out, sometimes girl that you’ve booked becomes unavailable because she took another booking 10 min prior (remember, they are able to charge less BECAUSE they’re keeping ’em going).. Sometimes place is a bit untidy because six bookings in a row took place without any time in between to allow for housekeeping..
These places have it’s purpose and it’s own “niche” clientele: a lot of cabbies on their lunch break, a lot of office workers, out for a “quick fix”… There is also a type of client who always want someone “new” and “young”-these parlours are haven for those,as they entice new girls with a promise of a lot of money (which is true:for about first 3 weeks,after which the girl is not “new” anymore)
These lower priced agencies often offer 20-min specials at a reduced rate,as well.
So if you suddenly found yourself “hungry” or have been “hungry” for a while and just can’t save up the funds to eat at “Logan Brown” type of parlour, you can still find satisfaction at one of the lower priced ones.
The service is generally the same: you receive massage, BJ and sex. However, due to the lower prices and “volume” issue, ambiance and decor could fall short of the “top notch”.. The girls may not be as immaculately presented… They may not be as articulate as their counterparts in “posh” agencies or they may just not want to make an extra effort,as they get paid less..
So, yes, you would still satisfy your “hunger”, but it won’t be a particularly refined experience.

When booking an upscale escort, the expectations are quite different (as well they should be: lower priced agencies in Wellington charge $140/hour, while “upscale” could run you anywhere between $200-$400/hour. 50% is a HUGE difference).
Usually you peruse through  girls’ photos online, finding the one who really “floats your boat”. You read her profile. You contact her (often several times). You make a booking and eagerly anticipate it. Often times you saved up for a while to enjoy your time with an escort.
You should expect a beautifully appointed premises,spotlessly clean. Certain ambiance is present as well (both Betty and I happen to like candles for that purpose and some nice “mood” music). You don’t want to rush, so you engage in a conversation (on multiple-hour bookings I supply wine,cheese and fruit-I ask my clients in advance what type of wine or other beverage they prefer)..
For that price, you also expect a “full-on” experience (whatever it means to you: sometimes it’s a “girlfriend” thing with lots of passionate kissing and cuddling, sometimes it’s role play, sometimes it’s something deviant,even-all that is discussed prior to the booking). Once you came, you don’t expect to be rushed into a shower or the girl taking off: you might want to cuddle in the afterglow and continue the discussion two of you have started before…
Again, your “hunger” is satisfied, but… Totally different kettle of fish, isn’t it?

Since we are on the subject, I want to address the actual “service provider” issue.
Again, I’ll start with an example.
One of my exes is an amazingly talented Chef. She spent years of grueling training abroad to rise up to five-star status. She worked in premiere restaurant in Dubai, Melbourne and here in NZ. She commands very high wages… But she also throws sausage on the barbie for her family and puts together quick scrambled eggs and bacon for breakfast-nothing at all refined about that and she is not trying to make it so-every one of us can make those things exactly the same way she does (even myself, and I really can’t cook…LOL)
In recent years, due to the various circumstances, she had to take a job that paid substantially less than what she’s accustomed to… Then another one that paid even less than that.. Yip, economy is not doing so good these days and no one is willing to pay proper wages, even to most talented and gifted people and she has bills to pay and obligations to meet. Does it make her less of a Chef? Of course not. Does it take less of a skill to cook the food because the wage is less? Definitely not (she worked in a 5-star, very famous establishment in Auckland-they just didn’t want to pay the money). Will she be able to command high wages again when economy corrects (God, please don’t let us all drown)? Of course!
Same applies to working girls. Generally, they produce the level of service that is proportionate to the amount of money they get paid. And, yes, sometimes they work in a lower priced establishment because of the money. In there, they don’t provide the full spectrum of services they are trained for/capable of, simply because often it’s not required or there is no time for it or they don’t get paid enough to go “extra mile”.
For instance, I am a qualified clinical psychologist. In America I had a lot of regular clients who came to see me more for that side of things,rather than sexual. Yes, we had sex, but it was a very small part of an extensive booking.
I’m also trained for light BDSM. Again, a lot of clients want that integrated into the service (you’ll be surprised just how many).
I’m also well-traveled and well-versed in various subjects and can keep up an interesting conversation.
I am a qualified masseuse.
I am readily familiar with various investments and real estate subjects (a lot of clients ask for a real-time practical advice).
In a lower priced parlour where I worked until recently, the framework was not permitting me to utilise most of those qualities. If someone books 20 min or half an hour, there is barely enough time for a perfunctory massage, BJ and sex (I try to provide at least a couple different positions), let alone in-depth conversation.
On the same token, when only paid $90/hour, ($80 until few months ago), I was not willing to do advanced sessions without additional compensation-why should I?
Additionally, a lot of bookings were literally, “last minute”, with maybe 10 min notice or no notice at all-there was no time to prepare for anything.
These days, working independently, I plan my bookings in advance. Most of my clients want multi-hour bookings,as it gives them time to get the most out of it. I use very discreet, beautifully furnished premises with amazing view of Wellington’s harbour (people who own the apartment rent it by the hour).
I take time to get to know my clients and, being paid twice as much as I used to when working for an agency, I am quite willing to provide various extensive extras at no additional charge.

Bottom line: yes, money definitely makes a difference. And there is a place for “kebab shops” as well as “Logan Browns”.
Sometimes you want just a “kebab” and sometimes you want “duck confit”-this is the way life is

In the past few weeks a number of disturbing stories hit the newspapers: two escorts were found murdered in Melbourne (both in Port Melbourne, but so far they are treated as un-related homicides), a 14-year old girl nearly escaped kidnapping, another woman was found dead in one of the suburbs-killed by her boyfriend.

Where does simple attraction end and unhealthy/dangerous obsession begins? What pushes a person “over the edge”-so they lose all grip on reality?
As I’ve had my own scary stalker story (http://courtesansdiary.blogspot.com/2011/08/pitfalls-of-courtesans-life-client.html), I am very aware of client’s strange/suspicious behaviours.
Just today  a client came into the parlour and booked me. Receptionist warned me that he used to see this other girl named Summer all the time,but she left the industry about a month ago and he’s been asking for her ever since.
The booking was a tedious one, as the guy didn’t want massage or small talk-he just wanted to “go at it” for the whole hour (so he definitely got his money’s worth:/). At the end he asked me if I knew other girls. He wondered if I knew Summer specifically (he we go, I thought). When I told him I haven’t seen her in 3 months, he pressed, asking if she seemed happy or sad about a month ago. I reminded him that I haven’t seen the girl in THREE months (!!). For the next 10 min I was subjected to a barrage of questions: is it common for WLs to take time off work? What other parlours are in the area (he actually wrote down the addresses!)? Do parlours have our contact info?,etc,etc,etc. It was clear to me that he intended to go and visit all the other parlours in the area in an attempt to find Summer.
On the way out he stopped by the reception desk and tried to harass the receptionist, mumbling about “wanting to say goodbye to Summer”. He also tried to talk to another WL in passing,asking if she was Summer’s friend.
When he left, receptionist told me that he had actually written a letter to Summer and posted it to the parlour. She showed it to the management (good girl-it helps to keep people aware of what’s going on). In the letter, he made all those assumptions and it was pretty clear that he was obsessed with that girl.
This guy has clearly lost all touch with reality: in his mind, he actually had a RELATIONSHIP with WL! While for her it was clearly client/sex provider relationship, he imagined much,much more.
This is actually quite common psychological disorder: when one person starts imagining that another is in love with them and they are letting them know through certain looks,gestures and ambiguous wording.
Unfortunately, these sort of disorders tend to progress if left untreated-they can lead to physical violence,kidnapping or even worse.
Sex workers encounter this more often than anyone else,as the very nature of this business is intimacy.
The object is to make client feel “special” through kissing, hugging,passionate sex,etc. Often WL and client have heart-to-heart conversations,and a lot of private details are shared, thus creating this sense of intimacy.
It is so easy for a client to forget that we are just doing our job (sometimes all too good). That we are laughing at his jokes and listening with rapt attention because we are PAID to do so. Yes, we act sympathetic of his troubles and support your opinions, whether or not we actually feel that way,because we are “on the clock”…
It is important to gently remind clients that all  this “perfect world of intimacy” is largely a fantasy land. Reality is quite different AND ever present-no one lives in a dreamland “forever after’.
Yes, it is possible for a WL girl to fall for a client and it does happen… But not nearly as often as guys imagine.
If the girl likes you, she’ll find the way to let you know, trust me. There is no such thing as “she’s too shy” or “she probably doesn’t know how to breach the subject”.
You know that movie “He’s just not that into you”? Well, it’s the same with the girls-there are no “hidden” signs. If she is not volunteering her number/asking for yours/suggesting a meeting outside of work, guess what? She’s just not that into you!
Ladies,please be vigilant. Talk to your friends and people you trust about “clingy”, obsessive clients. Document all  communications with them ( you might need it later). Let people know when going to see clients on extensive bookings/out-of-town. We (all of us) can help each other by looking after each other.